Single Ladies, What does "Strong" look like?
Recently I spent some time with one of my favorite friends. Whenever we catch up, I am always amazed at her faithfulness to love Jesus with her whole heart, surrendering the parts of herself which feel broken so Jesus can heal her from the inside out. I want to share with you what she shared with me. Here's paraphrase of what she said:
Sharie, I have so much to tell you. The Lord has been teaching me so much. Recently, I realized I've been resentful with God for not giving me the desires of my heart; a husband with a house and children. Because this was all I'd ever wanted, and because it didn't seem like it was in his plan for me, I shut my heart off to my desires. I didn't know how to have a desire, not get it, and still be okay. But God opened my eyes to the reality that I'd shut off and shut down my heart so deeply that I had become closed-off and bitter.
This year, he's been teaching me how to focus on who I am becoming, (who he is creating inside me) instead of what I am doing (what he is doing for me). It has been a tough journey, but not long ago he challenged me to start praying for a husband. I didn't want to open up my heart to this because it was easier to close it off to a desire I wasn't sure he would fulfill. Still, I decided to obey and my heart has found so much more freedom in being vulnerable with Jesus than hiding behind a tough exterior.
What is Your "Strong"?
Before we talk about what strong is, let's talk about what strong is not.
I grew up with controlling and abusive step-fathers and a mother who had the responsibility to care for and support our family alone. These factors, along with a couple of heart-crushing break-ups left me wanting a good marriage, but not believing it was possible. I was tired of hoping for something that might hurt me or hold me back, so I decided I didn't need a guy. This decision was not a faith-filled. Honestly, my heart was mad, bitter and resentful. I was tired of caring and wanting. I walled myself off to hope. I thought suppressing it would make my desires disappear, but, instead I resented God for "blessing" everyone BUT me!
Your "strong" won't come from building walls around yourself or creating a tough exterior. It doesn't come from knowing-it-all or not needing anyone. It doesn't come from covering over your emptiness with good things, but from surrendering your most elusive desires to Jesus - no matter how many times or how long you have to keep giving them over. Your "strong" comes from giving your expectations to him in hopes that who you are becoming in Jesus will bring more joy than what you're getting from Jesus.
Identity in him is your greatest source of "Strong", sweet friend. Do not let your good desires sour your soul towards the one who loved you more than His life.
Let me end today by giving you verses to help you move forward in your faith.
- You are a Mountain: Those who trust in the Lord are like Mount Zion, which cannot be moved but stands forever. Psalm 125:1
- You have value as a Daughter: I will be a Father to you. You will be My sons and daughters, says the All-powerful God. 2 Corinthians 6:18
- You can be Free: Because I suffer and am in need, let the Lord think of me. You are my helper and the One Who sets me free. O my God, do not wait. Psalm 40:17
Jesus, I pray for my single sisters to find their "strong" in you today. Amen
© 2018 by Sharie King. All rights reserved.