I Love You More than My Perfection - Interview


Meet Holly Cox

Holly is such a sweet friend that I have enjoyed getting to know. She lives in Greenwood SC and serves as the assistant to the Campus Pastor and organizes the women's groups for the NewSpring Church's satellite campus. I am honored to have Holly share about how she overcame legalism and learned how to receive Jesus grace and forgiveness. You've love her wisdom!

What was your greatest take away from this chapter?

When I think about this chapter of I Love You More and what the Lord is teaching me through it, I can break it down into 3 main themes:  

  • "God is in love with us, not our perfect behavior."

  • Being vs Doing for Jesus : "Sanctification is hard work, so very often we cheat by trying to do what he 'expects' instead of becoming who he created us to be...God wants to teach us how to be before he teaches us what to do, or at least he wants us to learn how to be as we are doing."

  • Grace: "We are all a bunch of imperfect people trying to let God perfect us inside a messed-up world,"  

God is in love with us, not our perfect behavior.
— Sharie King, I love you more

When sin became a part of Adam and Eve’s identity, the Lord gave them the gift of dying so that after Jesus’ resurrection, they could be restored to their original design. Adam and Eve messed up, but God didn’t give up. Instead, he put into motion a plan of redemption.
— Sharie King, I Love You More

What did you learn about the character of God in this chapter?

I know for me, after I have had my quiet time in the morning and start getting dressed for work, it is so easy for my mind to wander and start to worry about things coming up during the day. The thought will start out as simple as me just going through the day's calendar of meetings, tasks, lunches/dinners with people and turn into me thinking about that tough conversation I need to have with someone or something that may be bothering me (sometimes even things out of my control).  I have started playing worship music (Corey Asbury is my Spotify station of choice these days) while I get ready to help focus my mind but even more than focusing my mind, this helps me just BE with Jesus as I go through my morning instead of jumping to the duties of the day!

From the very beginning, God has stopped at nothing to bring us back to right relationship with Him!...He knows what's best for us even when we feel like He is withholding something from us!

Death is a gift because it opens the way for resurrection.  WIthout death, there can't be resurrection! And without resurrection there can't be the gift of life!

What did you learn about your character?

I learned that I've lived a lot of my life caught up in this performance trap, trying to live up to expectations I perceived God had put on me, others had put on me, or even ones that I had put on myself. I grew up in chains of legalism and since college, God has been breaking the chains of legalism in me and showing me how I still struggle in living in the trap of trying to perform for God (enneagram 2 wing 3). I feel God still freeing me from this!  He is showing me that there is so much freedom when I focus on BEING with Him instead of trying to DO for Him. Luke 10-I am like Martha in putting expectations on not only myself but other people! This creates an easy target for Satan in my relationship with Jesus and with others!

How do you think you can practically apply what you've learned to your life / world?

  1. Intentionally spending time just being with Jesus whether that's through quiet time with Him during the day, singing the songs during worship at church or playing worship music while you're driving, at work, or doing things around the house. Annie F Downs says that we have the ability to every environment we walk in to set the tone for that environment!
  2. Surrounding ourselves with community who can remind us of who we are in Christ and call us out when they see us trying to perform for Jesus! I have several people, my boss and girls in my small group, to name a few, who are aware of this struggle and so when they see me falling in this trap, they can call this out and help me from staying in that trap.
  3. Remembering "We are all a bunch of imperfect people trying to let God perfect us inside a messed-up world,"...that we're none perfect and not always going to get it right; therefore, we need to extend grace to ourselves and others in our lives!

As I mentioned earlier, I have been so guilty of holding myself and others in my life to expectations that were unrealistics and not fair.  I've caught myself saying before, "If they loved me, they would ________", "If they cared about me, they would _________" which only leads to a trap of loneliness and disappointment. So God has so gently been asking me, "Who told you that...." as a lens to examine my expectations for myself and others through!

I heard a guy who leads a drug rehab facility say one time that he didn't want to be looked at as the recovered addict who has it all figured out but instead as a guy who is choosing daily to make the right decision that will keep him from doing drugs or alcohol again. As he said this, I couldn't help but think how much that is true about the Christian life---none have it all figured out but we are just people who are daily making the decision to listen to Jesus and do what He says (James 1:22) and so we should look at ourselves and others in this way as we choose to make wise choices but extend grace to each other!

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
— Hebrews 10:24-25

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This nine week study is a partner to my book ILYM. Each week has four days of study, including scripture with questions, a short lesson and ends with a prayer. The study can be done individually or with a few of your gal-pals since it also includes a Leader Guide and 9 video lessons for your convenience. 

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