4 Reasons We are Scared to Love: from the acronym L-O-V-E

Part O: We are scared to love because we objectify instead of seeing opportunity.

I used to run out my backdoor and into the woods when my mom told me my neighbor was coming over.  I was afraid she’d make me play dolls, and my task-oriented personality didn’t know how to contrive enough drama to make playing dolls any fun. Once we’d changed their outfits a few times, I was done. 

I felt much more at home in the woods with my brother playing in forts and using purple plants to spread imaginary blood all over my legs and clothing…much to my mom’s frustration. 

I thought my clever escape gave me freedom, but actually it propagated my loneliness.  Many of us adopt the idea that a good friend has to be like us: same favorite color, interests, hobbies, etc.  But if we hold out for our clone, we will soon find ourselves alone.  

Many of us remain isolated because we OBJECTIFY our sisters, taking away their humanity and turning them into an object: flirt, snob, reject, nerd, etc. The sporty girl turns her nose up at the ornamental girl who can’t get muddy. The popular and put together girl doesn't have time to notice the obscure girl in the corner who doesn't own a brush. If left unchecked, our stereotypes could go on for days, weeks, and possibly a lifetime.

When we let our differences outshine the opportunity of friendship, we lose.  But if we stop OBJECTIFYING our friends, our hearts will be open to new friendship OPPORTUNITIES.

I’ve enjoyed watching my niece Ruby grow up. This is a Facebook post her mom posted the other day, “This girl! On her way to church! Leopard print dress, leopard print glasses, purple feather boa, and stuffed lambie. It all screams praise the Lord!” 

Let me tell you what I’ve learned in my relationship with Ruby: she is nothing like me, and yet she is everything I want to be. I need her to show me how wonderful it is not to be like me. When I am around her, I am able to love and admire qualities that don’t come naturally to me and to worship God’s creativity. 

Hold that Thought and Make it Real:

James 1:17 says, “Every good and perfect gift comes down from above, coming down from the Father of heavenly lights.”

God’s character is so immense, he cannot display all of it in one person. So he spreads out his various qualities all over the human race. Each person carries his or her own unique representation of God’s character. So, in your search for a friend, remain open-minded. Who knows what goodness He could bring to you in an unexpected friend.    

That was Sweet, what should I Tweet?

  • @sharieking99 "When we let our differences outshine the opportunity of friendship, we lose."
  • @sharieking99 “Each person carries their own unique representation of God’s character.”
  • @sharieking99 “If we stop objectifying our friends, our hearts will be open to new friendship opportunities.”

© 2015 by Sharie King.  All rights reserved.

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